Value of third spaces: An Ode to Smokey Row Coffee

This coffeeshop that has held me up and kept me grounded

Browning trees. Wall of windows behind city traffic. Mix of chatter, background music, and espresso machines steaming fall lattes. Classic blue diner booth. Lemon poppyseed muffin freshly warmed. House coffee in mug. Pen in hand. Notebook at the ready. Fresh start in my heart. A lifetime of aches and love in my eyes.

This exact scene has played out time and time again in the eight years I have lived in Des Moines. This exact booth at Smokey Row Coffee has held me up year after year. This exact feeling has resurfaced over and over. These are the only through-lines of my time in this city.

Over the years, I have moved several times, changed a couple jobs, been married and divorced, gained and lost friends, was active and distant in the community, found and lost myself. Through it all, Smokey Row has held a seat for me. It’s been here to refill my cup again when I wanted to keep writing. It has let me people watch when I didn’t want to leave. It has given me a place to sit and be productive (or to procrastinate) that isn’t home or work.

Even in the pandemic lockdown, a friend went through the drive-thru and social distance-ly brought me a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup Tornado (similar to DQ’s Blizzards or Culver’s Concrete Mixers).

This coffeeshop has been my third space. My writing sanctuary. My revival.

Smokey Row has seen my poetry’s first drafts, manuscript spreads, and finished projects. It has seen first dates. Long-term relationship dates. Wedding plans and divorce plans. Breakfast dates with old friends. Lunch dates with new friends. Grad school study sessions. Workshops. Writing nights alone. Writing nights with friends. This place has seen many of my meals. It has seen me when I couldn’t afford to eat and let me hang out anyway.

These booths helped me begin discovering myself in 2017. Take my first big step as a poet in 2018. Re-evaluate my corporate career in 2019. [Then 2020 happened.] Re-enter the world in 2021. Re-evaluate my poetry career in 2022. Rediscover myself in 2023. Take my next big step as a poet in 2024. And once again, here I am in 2025 evaluating my next steps.

All of this to say two things. First, you should check out Smokey Row if you haven’t (not sponsored; although if they wanted to, I’d be down!). Second, I suggest we all evaluate what third spaces exist in our lives. Do you have a regular place to exist that isn’t home or work? The value of a place like this is unmatched.

Third spaces allow you to exist in the community in a way that is truly communal and helps you feel more connected to the area you live in. Coffeeshops, libraries, and parks are great examples of common third spaces.

Do you have a third space that helps you feel grounded? If yes, wonderful! I hope you’re pouring into those spaces. If no, take a look around, test some out, and find the ones that work for you. You never know what could come of it.

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Even with how ingrained Smokey Row is in my life, I’m shocked it doesn’t show up more in my poems. There’s actually only one draft where it’s mentioned, so I’ll share that one. It’s somehow still relevant to my life now. Enjoy this short piece drafted in April 2023:

Sitting in my coffeeshop
single for the first time in 5 years

feeling new to the city again
I know this moment well

The dark roast will soothe my wisened heart
as I watch traffic and soak in the unknown

My notebook will meet new scribbles
and hold my heaviest and happiest 

while the April grass waves to me
welcoming me home

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